turn over

A few weeks ago I was asked to introduce myself in a showroom as a model. YESS! Always dreamed of! I was there with my boyfriend. Very spontaneously I was called by the agency. Actually, we wanted to eat sushi … we better would have done that. When we arrived, I immediately felt out of place. People looked at me as if something was wrong with me. I explained why I was there and who sent me. I was treated like an object, not as a human. Just passed on but nobody really listened. So I came to the fitting and six people stared at me and another model. Crazy situation, uncomfortable. I was very happy when I was allowed to change clothes again. I had to write down the data of the agency and was allowed to leave. Nobody said goodbye. When we were out we laughed at this weird experience, the people who think they are better and let you feel it. Unfortunately I realized that this world is really based on lies. In the front compliments and behind the eyes went twisting and blaspheming. Terrible! Can you imagine living in such a world? No thanks! Not everyone is like that. I know that, but it’s sad to see a lot of people are and I know, I do not fit in there. Little lost now.
Also I was scouted by a model agency, I’m still unsure if I should try. It’s a great opportunity and I have nothing to lose. But this glamorous world is not as glamorous as it seems. If you do not have a name, you are virtually nothing. I’m on the best way to love myself, but it’s hard in this industry. If you get a ’no‘ or if you fail, then you have to stand upright and keep going. Easy to say. But let’s try.

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